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Alice March In Talking Shit Gets You Fucked: A Review 

Featuring the most unwieldy title since The Englishman Who Went Up A Hill And Came Down A Mountain, Alice March In Talking Shit Gets You Fucked is the story of an intrepid red-headed babysitter who talks shit. And gets fucked. 

Alice March In Talking Shit Gets You Fucked: An Overview

  • Cast: Alice March, Mr. Tony 
  • Runtime: 26 mins 
  • Produced by: Team Skeet 

Plot: Mr. Tony needs a babysitter, and he’s used Alice before. After showing her around, she takes a phone call. It turns out that Alice is talking mad shit about Mr. Tony – she’s saying Mr. Tony is cheap and his daughter is a brat. What’s more, she’s talking about stealing from Mr. Tony. This is frowned upon in babysitting circles. 

Mr. Tony is not impressed with Alice’s shit-talking and threatens to have her banned from the babysitter’s club. This is a huge deal.

Alice begs Mr. Tony not to tell the babysitter’s club. Mr. Tony comes to the conclusion that the only way out of this situation is if he blackmails Alice into having sex with him.

Alice is surprisingly cool with this, her only concern being that Mr. Tony might fuck her and then rat her out anyway. Mr. Tony, being an upright man of his word for someone who blackmails teens into sex, assures her that he will not.

Alice is happy to take him at his word, and the two of them get to fucking. 

Alice March In Talking Shit Gets You Fucked: Best Scenes 

Alice March In Talking Shit Gets You Fucked really only has one sex scene, and it’s the one immediately after Mr. Tony blackmails Alice into fucking him. 

Mr. Tony starts off by pulling Alice’s dress up and fondling her pert ass. He then takes her panties off and admires her pussy, remarking at one point that it is a “beautiful fucking pussy”. He also opines that the pussy in question is undoubtedly tight. 

That question will have to wait for a later time, however, as Mr. Tony instead opts for a blowjob, asking Alice to get on her knees. Alice is happy to oblige and blows our fearless protagonist. 

Mr. Tony, feeling that Alice’s fellatio skills pass muster, bids her get on the bed, and he fucks her doggy-style.

The two of them then move on to the reverse cowgirl, with Alice demonstrating that this is clearly not her first rodeo.

Throughout, Mr. Tony compliments Alice’s vagina, ass and general carnal abilities via the use of several colorful expletives. 

Alice, clearly encouraged by Mr. Tony’s kind words, disrobes fully and switches to cowgirl. The two then switch to missionary style and finally back to doggy.

Mr. Tony, clearly satisfied with Alice’s commitment to ethical babysitting by way of fucking her client without promising to change anything else, pulls out and cums on her ass. Alice remains gainfully employed, and everyone’s a winner. 

Should You Watch Alice March In Talking Shit Gets You Fucked? 

I would hardly classify it as being up there with Citizen Kane or Gone With The Wind, but this movie is watchable for the impish, elfin Alice March, if nothing else.

Her coquettish girl-next-door looks clash nicely with her devious and manipulative persona. And she really does have a juicy pussy. 

I’m Nicole and I’ve been rubbing my c*nt to porn since I first discovered the internet, and it’s played a defining role in my life ever since. Newporncity has been described as an adult guide by porn fanatics, for porn fanatics and it's my gift to the adult industry I adore and my fellow porn enthusiasts, whom I equally love.


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